8. Support For the New Caregiver
By Susan Ellis of Keylifejourneys
It is a cold winter's day here in Toronto. As I write this I look out at my bare garden, bereft of snow. It looks almost as if… But I know I can't go out and start digging, preparing the earth for planting. Looks are deceptive. Step out the door and I will be in sub freezing temperatures. Try forcing my spade into the earth and I will discover a solid mass, earth frozen hard as concrete. The timing is not right.
Care giving is like that. The timing is never appropriate. The conditions are never right and without experience - how do we know what will work and what won't?
When my partner's Multiple Sclerosis made it unsafe for her to be on her own, the staff in the rehabilitation hospital started filling papers for a long term care institution. I'd never cared for a dependent person before, I'd never had children for example. But I said. "She's coming home with me." What a journey. In all reality I didn't know what I was in for.
I wonder if there had been someone then who could have given me some words of wisdom to help me prepare, would it have helped? If there were some consoling words I could have focused on in the cold dark hours before the dawn when I was unable to sleep because of fear of failing her and loss of confidence, would it have been easier?
I was a caregiver for 10 years before death separated me from my role. During those years we created 4 videos to help caregivers and those whose role it is to support caregivers. But now I want to write some e-books. I have ten years of acquired wisdom. What about you? Will you help me?
I've often thought "if I'd only known then what I know now..."
Could you please share some of those words of wisdom for people about to face what you have already experienced? I will make the free e-book available to everyone. Everyone who has cared for a parent, a partner or a child has wisdom to share.
Please send me a single sentence or a paragraph sharing something you wished you'd known from the start. I know others need us. I can be reached at sue@keylifejourneys.com or write a comment below. Alternatively Click here to fill out this Survey.
It is a cold winter's day here in Toronto. As I write this I look out at my bare garden, bereft of snow. It looks almost as if… But I know I can't go out and start digging, preparing the earth for planting. Looks are deceptive. Step out the door and I will be in sub freezing temperatures. Try forcing my spade into the earth and I will discover a solid mass, earth frozen hard as concrete. The timing is not right.
Care giving is like that. The timing is never appropriate. The conditions are never right and without experience - how do we know what will work and what won't?
When my partner's Multiple Sclerosis made it unsafe for her to be on her own, the staff in the rehabilitation hospital started filling papers for a long term care institution. I'd never cared for a dependent person before, I'd never had children for example. But I said. "She's coming home with me." What a journey. In all reality I didn't know what I was in for.
I wonder if there had been someone then who could have given me some words of wisdom to help me prepare, would it have helped? If there were some consoling words I could have focused on in the cold dark hours before the dawn when I was unable to sleep because of fear of failing her and loss of confidence, would it have been easier?
I was a caregiver for 10 years before death separated me from my role. During those years we created 4 videos to help caregivers and those whose role it is to support caregivers. But now I want to write some e-books. I have ten years of acquired wisdom. What about you? Will you help me?
I've often thought "if I'd only known then what I know now..."
Could you please share some of those words of wisdom for people about to face what you have already experienced? I will make the free e-book available to everyone. Everyone who has cared for a parent, a partner or a child has wisdom to share.
Please send me a single sentence or a paragraph sharing something you wished you'd known from the start. I know others need us. I can be reached at sue@keylifejourneys.com or write a comment below. Alternatively Click here to fill out this Survey.
Posted by Key Life Journey's Blog at 1/31/2010 3:36 PM 
Categories: Multiple Sclerosis, care giving
Tags: Multiple Sclerosis caregiver
Categories: Multiple Sclerosis, care giving
Tags: Multiple Sclerosis caregiver
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